Oh kids…Uncle Josh took it on the chin this week. I had a semi-bad cold going into last weekend but I was staving it off with Vitamin C and Bioflavinoids. Well, we installed well over 800 feet of solid hardwood in my downstairs–just me, my wife, my cousin who knows what he’s doing and a rented nail gun from the Depot. It took us almost twenty-four hours of manual ass sweating labor (the kind I’m not generally familiar with doing) but it was done. At the end of last Sunday, we were exhausted, the house looked like the end of Poltergeist, and it looked like my wife was coming down with my cold.
Wishful thinking.
Turns out, she was getting the full on flu–the kind which puts your ass down in the bed for two straight days in that not so 9 and a half weeks way. More like the end of Terms of Endearment way.
Then my son got it. I worked from home on Wednesday in case my son had to go to Urgent Care I’d be there to take him. My cold was in its final throes and I was looking forward to a good week. When I woke up Thursday morning, I knew something wasn’t right. My head cold wasn’t just renewed, it had been invigorated. I stumbled through my day like an automaton hazing through a fog. By 13:00, I had developed a 102 degree fever and I barely remember leaving work, driving home, getting in bed with my tie and dress socks still on and I slept for six straight hours. When I woke it was dark. I almost crawled down to the couch and planted my ass for the next two days. I didn’t eat and drank what water I could muster. The coughing set in around midnight the second day and I once went into a coughing fit so hard that I vomited.
Good times. Good times.
The fever broke mid-day yesterday and I’ve been steadily improving in stamina ever since. Although I’m not ready to run any marathons, I do look forward to this being a much more productive week. In a few weeks, we’ll be installing tile floor (about 600 square feet) in my kitchen, laundry room and downstairs bathroom. So, I’m saving myself for that little task.
Oh and did I mention that my daughter now has a fever and my XBOX 360 got the Red Ring of Death this week.
It’s been a great fucking week!
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Joshua Minton holds a Creative Writing degree from BGSU and is the author of 


I know exactly how you’re feeling as I’ve been battling a head cold as well. How anyone can catch it in Sunny San Diego is a mystery, but the bug somehow got me. The semester just started and I had to cancell the second half the week’s worth of classes. I’ll be back to OK on Monday. Get well, my friend.